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‘‘Plain
Language’’ is a regular feature of the Michigan Bar Journal,
edited by Joseph Kimble for the Bar Journal Advisory Board’s Plain
English Committee. The assistant editor is George Hathaway. The
committee seeks to improve the clarity of legal writing and the
public opinion of lawyers by eliminating legalese. Want to contribute
a plain English article? Contact Prof. Kimble at Thomas Cooley Law
School, P.O. Box 13038, Lansing, MI 48901. For information about
the Plain English Committee, see our website—http://www.michbar.org/generalinfo/plainenglish/home.cfm.
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We all
write letters to nonlawyer clients at some time. Yet what we write is
often poorly targeted to that audience. A partner in a prestigious law
firm recently told me that he is ‘‘appalled’’ at the writing style of
letters that his colleagues send to clients: the tone and style are too
stuffy and legalistic.
As
lawyers, we need to be aware that when we write to clients, we face a
dramatic shift in audience. In this article I address three typical characteristics
of legal language that appear too often in client letters: legalisms,
legal citation, and overformality. I’ll paraphrase George Bernard Shaw
(who used literature and literary where I’m using law
and legal):
In
law the ambition of a novice is to acquire the legal language; the struggle
of the adept is to get rid of it.1
Avoid
Using Legalisms
Legalisms
are ‘‘the circumlocutions, formal words, and archaisms that characterize
lawyers’ speech and writing.’’2
They are the distinctive characteristics of traditional legal-writing
style.
But
you ought to banish them from client letters. Simply put, do not use traditional
legal writing style when writing to clients. Try not to sound like
a lawyer. That’s a challenge because legalisms abound in what lawyers
read and in what they normally write. Many lawyers will continue to use
legalistic words and phrases when writing to clients, primarily for two
reasons.
First,
some lawyers use legalisms to impress or intimidate the client. Under
this theory, the client who is baffled by the language is the client who
needs the lawyer. I say impress the client with your knowledge of the
law, with your ability to get favorable results, and with your hard work.
Second,
some lawyers use legalisms out of habit or reflex. Sometimes lawyers forget
what they didn’t know. That happens to teachers all the time. You teach
the concept from the perspective of one with 10 or 20 years’ experience,
forgetting that your audience has no experience. But skilled teachers—and
practitioners—adapt their writing to the audience.
Here
is an example of how it can be done.
Examples
of Legalisms
Read
this excerpt from a practitioner’s letter to a new client. Typical legalisms
are highlighted.
Dear
Mr. Wilkins:
Enclosed please find the retainer agreement. Please sign and return
same at your earliest convenience.
Pursuant to our conversation of December 20, 2001, I have conducted
legal research on the question as to whether your arbitration claim
was timely under the Texas Seed Arbitration Act. Tex. Agric. Code Ann.
§ 64.006(a) (Vernon 2001) (the ‘‘Act’’). According to Texas common
law construing the Act, the court would apply the plain-meaning
canon of construction, Fitzgerald v. Advanced Spine Fixation
Systems, Inc., 996 S.W.2d 864, 865 (Tex. 1999), and should hold that
said claim was timely.
Unfortunately, this conclusion is not guaranteed and is subject to certain
qualifications discussed herein. See, e.g., Continental Cas.
Ins. Co. v. Functional Restoration Assocs., 19 S.W.3d 393, 399 (Tex.
2000).
These
boldface terms are almost exclusively ‘‘legal’’; that is, only lawyers
use them. These words and phrases fall into different categories: same,
pursuant to, said, and herein are commonly used by lawyers,
but do not have unique legal meanings; common law and canon
of construction have specialized legal meanings. But you can replace
all of them with common terms:
| Instead
of |
Write |
| same |
it,
the agreement
|
| Pursuant
to |
As
discussed in,
As we agreed |
| common
law |
court
cases,
judicial decisions |
| canon
of construction |
rule,
method of interpreting statutes |
| said |
the,
your |
| herein |
here,
in this letter |
By removing
the legalisms, you make the text easier for the client to understand,
and you avoid sounding pompous.
Limit
Formal Legal Citations or Simplify Them Greatly
The
example letter I excerpted contains three legal citations. All three use
correct form.3
All three direct the reader to the proper authority. All three state
the proposi/ion they are cited for. So what’s the problem?
First,
they clutter up the text. Legal readers are used to citations and, frankly,
are apt to skip over them. But to the uninitiated, they are large road
humps. They’re too long to be ignored, and yet they are not textual sentences,
so readers must slow down and try to figure them out. Good client writing
doesn’t ask the reader to slow down and figure things out.
Second,
they contain specialized information that most clients won’t understand.
In particular, the volume-reporter-page portion of the citation can be
baffling: 996 S.W.2d 864. Certainly that means nothing to the nonlawyer
client.
Third,
citation signals must certainly seem strange to the client. What is See,
e.g.? Signals are a perfect example of something that has a specialized
legal meaning. Their meaning is not intuitive, but is specially defined
in citation manuals. We should not expect our clients to consult a citation
manual.
So
rather than lard your client letters with legal citations, choose from
these options:
Option
1
Omit
citation to legal authority altogether. Ask yourself these questions:
How important is it for my client to know the citation to the Texas Agriculture
Code? Can’t I just say Texas law or Texas statutes? Does
my client need to know that the case I am relying on is Fitzgerald
v. Advanced Spine Fixation Systems, Inc., that it is found in volume
996 of the South Western Reporter, Second Series, page 864, and that it
was decided by the Texas Supreme Court in 1999? (Besides, is my client
going to know what the South Western Reporter, Second Series is? Or that
it’s abbreviated S.W.2d?)
Completely
omitting the citations in client letters really cleans up the text and
makes the document much more readable. But some lawyers will not want
to go that far. And in some situations, you do want the client
to know the names and sources of the authority.
Option
2
Put
the citations in footnotes. This technique has much the same effect as
omitting the citations because now the long, baffling road humps are gone,
and the client can read the text smoothly. Most clients will treat the
footnotes as ‘‘legal stuff’’ and will ignore them, and those who want
the bibliographic information can find it in the footnotes. But footnotes
are a mixed blessing. Some clients will be annoyed that some information
is at the bottom of the page and requires them to nod up and down to take
it all in.
Option
3
Use
a shortened form of the citation. Rather than list the entire case name
and bibliographic information, simply refer to the case in a shorthand
way. Leave the details in your memo to the file.
Under
Option 3, our letter excerpt might look like this (with the legalisms
replaced):
Dear
Mr. Wilkins:
Enclosed please find the retainer agreement. Please sign and return
it at your earliest convenience.
As we discussed in our conversation of December 20, 2001, I have conducted
legal research on the question as to whether your arbitration claim
was timely under the Texas Seed Arbitration Act. According to a Texas
case called Fitzgerald, the court would apply the plain-meaning
rule and should hold that your claim was timely.
Unfortunately, this conclusion is not guaranteed and is subject to certain
qualifications discussed in this letter. For example, one qualification
arises from a Texas Supreme Court case called Continental Casualty
decided in 2000.
Use
a Colloquial Tone
By
‘‘colloquial,’’ I do not mean slangy or substandard language. The phrase
‘‘colloquial tone’’ means ‘‘a conversational style.’’4
Of course, we should usually not write to clients in the same way we speak
or carry on conversation. That is far too informal and would appear unprofessional.
But we can write in a clear, simple, and direct way that avoids
pompous, turgid prose.
Ultimately,
lawyers should reduce—slightly—the level of formality when writing to
clients. What is too formal and what is too informal will often be a matter
of taste, but consider a few examples from our revised excerpt. I have
highlighted the words and phrases that strike me as unnecessarily formal
or stuffy.
Dear
Mr. Wilkins:
Enclosed
please find the retainer agreement. Please sign and return it at
your earliest convenience.
As we discussed in our conversation of December 20, 2001, I have conducted
legal research on the question as to whether your arbitration
claim was timely under the Texas Seed Arbitration Act. According to
a Texas case called Fitzgerald, the court would apply the plain-meaning
rule and should hold that your claim was timely.
Unfortunately, this conclusion is not guaranteed and is subject
to certain qualifications discussed in this letter. For example,
one qualification arises from a Texas Supreme Court case called Continental
Casualty decided in 2000.
None
of these phrases is wrong or bad; they simply elevate the formality unnecessarily.
They create a distance between the writer and the reader—a distance you
do not want between you and your client.
Here
are some possible revisions:
| Formal
Phrase |
Comment |
| Enclosed
please find |
This
phrase and its sister, Please find enclosed,
have been criticized since 1880.5
Try Here is or I have enclosed. |
| at
your earliest
convenience |
Almost
harmless, but stuffy; try as soon as you can
or when you can.
|
| conducted
legal research |
One
word, researched, is turned into three. |
| the
question as to
whether |
A
common legal space filler; prefer whether. |
| Unfortunately
|
Perfectly
correct, but long. Short transition words make
your writing easier to read.6
Use But. (And yes, you can
start a sentence with But.) |
| subject
to certain qualifications |
Highly
formal; perhaps we should omit it or revise it in a
complete
reworking of the sentence. Suggestion: there
are
exceptions.
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By
avoiding legalisms, limiting citations, and adopting a less formal tone,
we now have a shorter, clearer, and more readily understandable letter.
Here
is our final revision:
Dear
Mr. Wilkins:
Here is the retainer agreement. Please sign and return it as soon as
you can.
As we discussed in our conversation of December 20, 2001, I have researched
whether your arbitration claim was timely under the Texas Seed Arbitration
Act. According to a Texas case called Fitzgerald, the court would
apply the plain-meaning rule and should hold that your claim was timely.
But this conclusion is not guaranteed; there are some exceptions, which
I discuss in this letter. For example, one exception arises from a Texas
Supreme Court case called Continental Casualty decided in 2000.
Footnotes
1.
Quoted in John R. Trimble, Writing With Style: Conversations on the
Art of Writing 183 (2d ed., Prentice Hall 2000).
2.
Bryan A. Garner, A Dictionary of Modern Legal Usage 516 (2d ed.,
Oxford U. Press 1995).
3.
Both are correct under either The Bluebook: A Uniform System of Citation
(Columbia Law Review Ass’n et al. eds., 17th ed. 2000) and Association
of Legal Writing Directors & Darby Dickerson, ALWD Citation Manual:
A Professional System of Citation (Aspen L. & Bus. 2000).
4.
Garner, A Dictionary of Modern Legal Usage at 171.
5.
Garner, A Dictionary of Modern Legal Usage at 314. See also, Bryan
A. Garner, The Elements of Legal Style 112 (Oxford U. Press 1991).
6.
Garner, Legal Writing in Plain English at 50.
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